There’s nothing worse than scrolling through Facebook on your lunch break and coming across something better left NEVER, EVER, EVER SEEN – EVER – but because some parents just do not understand social media, there it is in your news feed, floating on the Internet like the floater in the toilet.
Because that’s what it is. A poop picture courtesy of a parent who doesn’t seem to realize that poop? Not the cutest thing their little cutems is ever going to do.
Not by a long shot. We promise.
1. Little Booger
Newsflash, folks! NO1CURR about your kid’s boogers. Nope. They don’t.
2. Don’t Be This Dad
Don’t be this dad. Ever. At all. Not even if you ARE a dude.
3. Damn Enter Key!
This parent seems to have forgotten that the enter key starts a new comment and decided to share the play by play of the day in a 6-comment thread.
4. Doctorate Shmoctorate!
Who CARES if you got a doctorate at 21 from Stanford? YOU’RE NOT A PARENT! YOU DON’T COUNT.
5. Daylight Savings Complainers
Complaining about Daylight Savings Time and all your lost sleep might make you feel better. Or it’ll make you friendless.
6. Game of Poop
What do you get when you combine a love of oversharing with a love of Game of Thrones? This parent. That’s what.
7. Humblebraggers
Oh, the humblebragger. She wants everyone to know that her son is smarter than your son but (not so) cleverly disguises her sharing.
8. Lazy Days
Oh, those lazy days of parenting! They’re totes not lazy! See? This parent can prove it!
9. Tub Poop
Every parent has probably been here. Not every parent has felt compelled to share it on Facebook. At least there isn’t a picture.
10. Sleep Is For the Weak
Sleep is a thing you don’t get to do anymore when you’re a parent. Complaining about it on Facebook makes you less sleep. IT’S A FACT.
11. Stroller Derby
Hmmm, do I want the $ 300 stroller that normally goes for $ 500 or the $ 239? OOH! I WANT A MINI VAN!
12. So Much NOPE
In the line of offensive baby attire, this might be the worst we’ve ever seen. Even worse than onesies declaring baby boys to be “boob men.”
13. That’ll Teach Her
This mom decided to SHAVE HER DAUGHTER’S HEAD when the little girl got some safety scissors after her goldie locks. OMG!
14. They Just Can’t Win
Even when this mom does it right by NOT being a narcissistic oversharer, she’s doing it wrong. Wait, what?
15. October Fools!
Clearly the person who posted this can’t read the directions that came with her pee sticks. And the pictures on the test aren’t good enough.
Or there’s the parent who constantly complains about everything from Daylight Savings Time and the lack of sleep to the fact that stores don’t open at 9:00 because that’s when she’s in the parking lot and doesn’t Target know that? I mean, doesn’t the world revolve around her kid’s nap schedule??
FOR THE LOVE. No. No it does not. So just stop it with that already!
And stop it with your Mommyjacking, too!
(Mommyjacking: a term used to describe the event which occurs when someone posts something great they’ve accomplished and a mommy comes along to say “nothing’s better than being a mommy!” or “just you wait until you’re a mommy!”)
Anyway, scroll through the cringe-worthy gallery above for examples of 15 people who need to get the EFF OFF of Facebook IMMEDIATELY.
And just for fun, after the jump, let’s also pay homage to those parents who take to social media to shame their children for myriad offenses.
Because nothing says “this is for your own good” like humiliating kids on Facebook with an embarrassing picture that gets to live forever and ever thanks to technology …
1. I Really Relate to Taylor Swift Songs!
Okay, the girl walked right into this one. Big time.
2. DTF?
DTF? What does that mean? Mom and dad don’t watch Jersey Shore apparently … and we’re sorta jealous of them.
3. The Thug Life Chose Me
You don’t choose the thug life, the thug life chooses you. You do, however, choose to befriend your parents on Facebook.
4. Justin Bieber Poster Child Abuse
Covering your kid’s room in Justin Bieber posters is one thing. Doing it just so you can brag about it on Facebook is quite another.
5. Selfie Time!
When your dad spoofs your selfies on Facebook, that may be a new (hilarious) low.
6. Socks
Nothing is really lost until your mom can’t find it … except your pride. That can be lost for good.
7. How Did We Meet?
The one word to describe how a mother and child first met … literally.
8. The Day We Met
Another fond memory of how this Facebook user met some of the people in his life.
9. Good Save, Dad
Dad really dug himself into a hole with this one, but recovered with a nice (albeit totally insincere) save.
10. Twerkin’ Out at the Gym!
Not uncomfortable at all when your pop posts this to his timeline.
11. Photo Album Fun
This is a common sight on Facebook. The easiest and most frequent way to humiliate your kids.
12. 50 Shades of Awkward
Mom reads 50 Shades of Grey. And will tell you all about it in front of everyone you know.
13. Does Your Wife Have to Look at That?
Questions you don’t need to be putting on Facebook in general … especially if you are “friends” with your folks on there.
15 Parents Who Need To Get The EFF OFF Facebook NOW!
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